Dating a guy with social anxiety disorder


Shared interests like hiking, carpentry or dancing will keep both you and your date busy, give you something to talk about, and at the end of the evening bring you closer together. If you both are into sports, you could go watch a football game or drop in at the local driving range to hit a few balls. Other places of interest like a zoo, carnival, circus or amusement park can also be great dating ideas if you wish to go easy on the activity but keep it non-threatening at the same time.

Dating someone with social anxiety isn’t easy — here’s how to make it work

Have a clear plan For a person suffering from anxiety disorder, a lot of the stress comes from conjuring up threatening situations and consequences. In order to allay this anxiety, decide on a distinct start and end time for the date. Anti-depressants, particularly the SSRIS, are commonly prescribed in treatment of anxiety disorder, while sometimes benzodiazepines may also be advised. Like with most medication, anti-depressants too have certain clear contraindications and side effects which can range from relatively milder ones like nausea to more serious ones like sexual dysfunction.

And the more aware you are of these, the smoother your dating relationship will be. Therapy is often effective in treatment of anxiety disorders; whether you go with your partner to therapy or do it on your own, either resource will help you better understand anxiety disorders and how to handle tough situations in your relationship. Big groups of new people provide a lot of opportunities for your partner to believe he did something wrong. Aka you could be going home early.

Having Patience and Setting Boundaries

They need to surround themselves with people who they know understand them, and who they know they cannot possibly offend. You cannot control who will be at a party.

Social Anxiety Disorder

You cannot predict what some stranger may possibly say to your partner to send him into a panic spiral the rest of the night. You have to be very careful when it comes to teasing your partner.


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Do not make any jokes implying he is being rude, insensitive or egotistical. Should you even mildly hint he did something that bothered you, you are welcoming a thirty-minute explanation. In this way, you can both gain greater awareness of your personal and interpersonal challenges and develop the boundaries necessary for healthy relationship dynamics.

Realities Of Dating Someone With Social Anxiety

Professional treatment support is the other critical piece of the puzzle on the path of recovery. When Ariel started dating Paul, it was all warmth and excitement for the first few weeks. But then things started to get a little tense. It was as if their dynamic was completely different when they were together compared with when they were apart.

Paul would check in often but repeatedly want to know where she was or who she was with. He was self-disparaging, especially if she was busy and unable to respond to his messages for a while. The negativity seemed to get heavier and heavier; eventually, Ariel brought it up with Paul when they were together.


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Paul was nervous that telling Ariel the truth about his anxiety might mean an end to their relationship. As Ariel came to discover, dating someone with anxiety is a lot like any other relationship: The relationship itself can be a trigger for their anxious perceptions.

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Dating Someone with Anxiety: Building Boundaries and Support – Bridges to Recovery

They may appear controlling and critical, they may be distracted and unfocused, or they may be withdrawn and passive-aggressive. All of these tendencies can wear on you both and on your relationship. One of the most effective measures to building a supportive relationship with anxiety in tow is to foster space for honest communication and to practice it regularly.

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