Meena, a commentator here at Polygamy , shared with us 5 important things to know about Pakistani men as it pertains to non-Pakistani women. She based it on the true story of her involvement with one.
If you met him online, there are 5 important things to know about Pakistani men
He was her boyfriend. Her story is as follows:. Meena stated, I have been dating a Pakistani man for almost a year and half now. I met my boyfriend here in Australia; he has a permanent residency and has already applied for citizenship without any assistance from me. We exchanged numbers when we met, but I only agreed to go on a date with him again after 1.
Our first date was a breakfast meeting and I asked lots of questions about his family and his life. They love to chat and play with women online with no intention whatsoever to turn it into anything serious. Except, of course, if they want sponsorship for a visa. To get to the truth, you must take time to get to know them. Insist on meeting their friends and family members. Ask to speak to friends and family in Pakistan via a video call and observe their surroundings when you do.
Speak to their friends without them being present. Ask a lot of questions and see if their stories marry up. If the man you want to date refuses to introduce you to any family member or friend, walk away!!!!! I have access to his phone and his emails. He shows me his bank statements. I learned about his culture and religion through reading, research, and speaking to experts in the community. So not all apples in the barrel are rotten. Say this over and over again.
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One year into the relationship, my boyfriend still blurted out that someday he will go and have an arranged marriage in Pakistan. Then he will come back and we will carry on as boyfriend and girlfriend. I think he thought I was so in-love with him that I was willing to give up my values.
So I broke up with him and refused to answer his calls. One of his cousins called their uncle, who is the head of their family here, and told him about me. The uncle spoke to my boyfriend, and asked what he wanted. My boyfriend did persist and wait outside my house to speak to me until I decided to talk to him after 3 weeks. He said I was very strong, and that he wholeheartedly accepted that polygamy is not an option if he wanted me in his life.
It was his friends who taught me this valuable lesson. However, in their culture the man takes care of everything that his wife needs. Of course, I make sure that I only ask for things that are within his means and only for basic things like food, clothing and shelter.
Or the occasional treat.
What will Happen if You Marry Pakistani? | Home | Marrying Pakistani
Remember that the way they view and manage assets is different from the Western way. All money and assets are owned by the whole extended family. The tribal leaders try to help and settle disputes, but there are a lot of secret deals going on.
You can never ever change that and if you insist, they will just hide things from you. My rule is that as long as he supports my desired lifestyle: A house under my name is one of my preconditions for marriage — he pays the deposit, and we jointly pay the rest. I know that I may sound heartless, but I do love my boyfriend. He readily parts with his hard-earned money if his friends need help. He gives so much emotional support when I have issues at work even if he has no clue about my job.
We have a long way to go before marriage, but I have hope that this is for life. I thank Meena, the author of the article for sharing with us the 5 important things to know about Pakistani men. It was kind and thoughtful of her to write it. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. You have to believe your first gut instinct. The most painful part is that: Your boyfriend might be an engineer coz he is good in planning without executing the plans LOL. You said you have met him online.
So why have you trust him that much whereas you have not met him so far? Pakistanis are different from Filipinos. Ana was right, he has shown you his true colors and you need to put the full stop there. Indirectly he relays the message to you by blocking you on social media and no need of further explanations from his side. Is that typical of what someone does to someone he or she loves? It sounds to me that either he was lying to you the whole time about his plans for you or he changed his mind once it got closer to becoming a reality.
Well, some people act cowardly. When people are ashamed of themselves or want to avoid a confrontation, they seemly drop off the face of the earth, so to speak.
They do it so not to have to deal with a situation directly. Dating in the typical sense of the word is not something that Muslims are supposed to do. Your Beau may already be married or engaged to someone in Pakistan, as well. They traditionally marry their own people and in seeing that you are not Pakistani, it may present a problem for you and him. There are simply too many strikes against you in dealing with a Pakistani when you are not one yourself. Muslims are supposed to marry Muslims only.liseforthnanro.ml
5 Important Things to Know About Pakistani Men
Please check in and give us an update on your situation. Jena, it sounds as if you have dodged a bullet. I am sure that you have deep feelings, and may even be in love with this man. If you can find the strength, please stop trying to get in touch with him. It sounds as if he does not want to communicate with you.
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Once a person shows you who he really is, believe it. Someone who truly cares for another responds to messages and does not block the person. Hi maria, I am a filipina, i have met my pakistani boyfriend thru online who is a businessman in philippines. We had lots of videocalls. He told me everything abt his background. Im going home in philippines in few days time, we agreed that im staying home for good and be with him but 2 weeks ago..
Just today, i found out.. Last time he said, he have lots of surprises for me but i dont understand now why he is ignoring me eventhough i have a very long patience, still i need to know why he is doing this kind of way. Why dont he just tell it straight to my face if he dont want me anymore. But i salute them for being strong with whatever circumstances they were right now. Any how, we have been grateful that we came along with this blog. Really it helps a lot. Hats off to all ladies here who survived and still recovering after the big storm came in their lives.
Stay strong and more power to you all. A, may Allah bless you and more, as well.
How to distinguish between a traditional Pakistani man vs. a modern one!
The wonderful ladies such as yourself and the gents who write here contribute in making this blog all that it is. You writing in as you did helps tremendously. If no one wrote here, there would be nothing to read other than what I write, which would become monotonous and one-sided LOL. Last night i received a notification that somebody has posted a new comment here. When i saw your name, was thinking that this might be a new agony of yours again but i was wrong. Instead it was a good news from your side and was happy to hear from you after a while.
Great that you have moved on totally. Thank you for keeping us posted here and wishing you all the best. Ana, this blog has helped a lot of women. May Allah bless you more and thanks for being a big sister for ladies who need advises. Annabelah, yeah I do listened and kept with me all of your advises, all I can say is that Thank you all and may God Allah bless us all.
Thanks again I hope you and all hu are giving advises here will continue to save those women that have been get lost and been deceived with. You are engaged God is Great! You certainly are a bearer of good news. I hope for you the best. I was going through a phase, remember? I still kept my guard up.
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